Heartbreak

Tyson’s most obvious heartbreaks are from Kim and Sebastian.

However, they are far from the only ones to break his heart. For all his plethora of trust issues, Tyson hands over his heart far too easily.

There was also Peter Campbell, one of the people Tyson’s father paid to pretend to be Tyson’s friend; Lee, the French student in Tyson’s military history class who still makes his heart flutter to think of; Geoffrey, one of his fellow strategists in the army who got engaged in the time it took him to find his confidence; and too many others to count.

Tyson doesn’t so much offer his heart out, as throw it as hard as he can at an impassible wall, then somehow seems surprised when he gets hurt.

That said, Tyson handles heartbreak far too well. He is content to pine - to hurt and hurt - so long as the other person is happy, wherever they are.

Noire

Tyson has a soft spot in his head for the spy/detective genres as a whole, but especially Noire.

The concept of ‘It’s a dirty job, but someone has to do it’ appeals strongly to Tyson in his current line of work. Even - and perhaps especially - the parts that he is good at, Tyson hates the work he does for the Moriarty Mirrors and he’s never hidden that, but he will keep doing it for them untiringly.

The bittersweet sentiment that even when everything is horrible, grim and dark, there is still hope. Still a silver lining and a reason to keep marching forward. The idea that, however slim it may be, that silver lining is worth fighting for is a great comfort to Tyson.

He finds noire to be incredibly cathartic. He is trying to do as much good as possible, by minimising collateral damage and redirecting the crosshairs into better places. Tyson doesn’t think that makes him a good person, but he’s trying his best and, when he can’t find a silver lining, forging them himself.

That counts for something. His battle might be in vain, but that doesn’t mean that it’s not a fight work taking.

Happiness

At best, Tyson is - usually - content with his place in the world.

He hates himself, he hates the work that he does and knows that he isn’t getting a happy ending in this lifetime, but he is content to shoulder that burden, because Tyson loves the Moriarty Mirrors and he will sacrifice everything for those he loves. Especially himself.

Tyson doesn’t know what to do with happiness. Not truly. There are times when he is happy, naturally, but once he realises that he’s happy, Tyson will go out of his way to distance himself from it. To run away from it. Unless he’s already in too deep to avoid further damage. He has to be eased into happiness, like a turtle in a cooking pot.

A stupid, stupid turtle in a pot that could never hurt him. The idiot.

He thinks that he doesn’t deserve happiness. Afraid that he’ll break it, that it will shatter under his fingertips and hurt those he cares about. Tyson simply does not get nice things; not unless they were going to be ripped away from him. He would rather hurt himself now, to avoid later pain.

Tyson would rather distance himself - shove people away, snarl words that he doesn’t mean with a vitriol only ever meant for himself - than risk hurting someone else by being their bad luck charm. Happiness is overwhelming for Tyson and he doesn’t know to how to accept it without fear, without guilt.

This is most commonly overruled by Tyson’s loyalty. He is loyal to a fault. No matter how much it hurts him, he won’t abandon those he cares about. Once Tyson cares, no matter how afraid he is, he can’t abandon someone; even if he tries to distance himself, Tyson can’t stay away completely.

To Tyson, that is a sign of weakness. That he is being selfish and even more ‘proof’ that he doesn’t deserve that happiness in the first place, because Tyson isn’t a good person, he’s dangerous and being around people puts them at risk. He doesn’t want to put innocent people in the crosshairs.

Staying is a sign of weakness and proves he doesn’t deserve that happiness, whereas running shows that he’s too weak to have earnt that happiness; too weak to deserve it. It’s a no-win scenario. Whatever action Tyson takes, he will convince himself that he’s being a coward.

London Underground

Though Tyson is generally uncomfortable in vehicles, he is the most comfortable when travelling by train. Whilst the train remains in that station, Tyson gets anxious about being around so many people, but the moment the train begins to move, he relaxes.

Tyson is more comfortable in a cramped, crowded underground train carriage than out on the open London streets with a small crowd on the pavement with him. For him, the London underground exists in another world that takes him where he needs to be and the people around him don’t matter anymore.

The London Underground is a safe place for Tyson. It’s home. Seasonally colder or warmer than the ground above, a safe cradle to retreat into and escape everything above. The lifeblood of the city he loves so much. The underground tunnels his Synesthesia allows him to follow around London from above.

Tyson could easily fall asleep on the London Underground and feel safe, not waking up in a panic or tensed for a crash at any moment. He doesn’t just lower his guard on the underground, Tyson’s armour dropped entirely. The weight stripped and lifted from his shoulders.

Within the London Underground, on the train or the tunnels leading to the stations, Tyson is weightless. Invulnerable. Without consequence. He’s not afraid of being attacked there, but he’s also more confident when enemies of the web are foolish enough to attack there. He is in his element.

The London Overground, the various train lines all over the United Kingdom, and the New York Subway are also comforting to Tyson, but not to the same extent. Waterloo, Victoria, & King’s Cross Station are all comforting signs that he’s back home; Lovely Lady London welcoming him home. More so than Heathrow or Gatwick airport.

Love & Hate

The simple way to put things is that Tyson loves and is afraid of both Sebastian and [the] Jim[s], but it's way more complicated than that.




Tyson will freely admit that he loves his owners, he is completely smitten by Moriarty and will do anything to please Jim, but Tyson has never meant this in a romantic way. It's not untrue to think that on some level Tyson's attraction is romantic, but he isn't full aware of that and it isn't the driving force of the emotion. For Tyson, love is the only way to quantify how he feels about Jim and how willing he is to lay his life down for the criminal. But this isn't something that's returned.

Yes, Jim can be affectionate with Tyson and show that he cares about his Pup; but Tyson doesn't believe, and has no reason to think, that Jim loves him. He isn't expecting Jim to ever feel that way and doesn't need him to, Tyson loves Jim because he loves Jim. It's as simple as that. He isn't pining for anything more, not that he'd turn it down if more was offered.

Tyson and (his 'canon') Sebastian were in a romantic relationship. Tyson loves Sebastian and the sentiment was/is returned. In the beginning this was a mutant, consensual relationship. Tyson was then manipulated, by the promise of affection and love then later violence, into a position where he couldn't say no and had no choice but to go with Sebastian.

Despite everything, Tyson still loves Sebastian, though wishes that he didn't any more, and knows Sebsatian still loves him too. Tyson doesn't want this. He wants to be completely done with Sebastian and continue his life without him, but he can't. Tyson knows he will always come when Sebastian calls.

The difference is that Tyson doesn't expect Jim to return his love and that's perfectly okay, whereas Tyson knows that Sebastian returns his loves and that is terrifying.

Being afraid of Jim Moriarty and Sebastian Moran is, in the broad scheme of things, very sensible. Even though he is in a relatively safe space as a shared pet of the Moriarty Mirrors, Tyson knows better than to think he is safe; James Moriarty is a dangerous man and to be feared. For obvious reasons, Tyson knows to be afraid of The Colonel and knows what he's capable of first hand. However, even these two emotions are very different.

With Jim, Tyson knows to be afraid but at the same time he knows that, largely, he's safe. So long as he keeps himself interested and useful for Jim, he's unlikely to be gotten rid of and he knows how not to annoy the criminal; avoiding his wrath. Tyson knows to be afraid of Jim, but he's rarely given a reason to be.

More times than Tyson cares to remember, he's been on the receiving end of Sebastian's anger. He knows to be afraid of Sebastian and has been given many good reasons to be afraid of the other man. Yet, Tyson doesn't fear Sebastian as much as Jim. It's fear of the unknown.

Yes, Tyson is terrified of Sebastian, but he knows what to expect from the sniper. He knows what Sebastain is capable of, but Tyson also knows what he is capable of surviving from The Colonel. Tyson can guess all he likes, but he doesn't know what Jim is capable of dishing out and he doesn't know if he could survive it.

Where to touch Tyson to panic/calm him