Sunday 20 May 2018

Death

Tyson doesn’t handle death well.
He copes incredibly well, but Tyson doesn’t internalise death in a healthy way.
He wears it like a second skin. He doesn’t let go of the deaths he’s caused. Tyson makes sure that they stick. That his blame lingers like the smell of smoke. Even deaths that aren’t his fault, like Captain Samson, Tyson shoulders - and internalises - the blame almost immediately.
Before they received news that General Clarkson survived Sebastian’s attack, Tyson had internalised the blame for that as well.
Tyson has spent so long doing that, taking that weight, that he’s almost numb to deaths that aren’t his fault; that even Tyson can’t blame himself for. He actually feels better when the guilt of thoughts like ‘why didn’t I prevent this from happening?’ come around.