Comfort and sexuality

Tyson's orientation is romantically bi, but sexually gay. Tyson is completely comfortable with his romantic orientation and feels no guilt in seeking relationships with males and females. However, despite accepting that it is his sexuality, he isn't comfortable being gay.

If he could stop being gay, then Tyson would. He's not proud of being gay. He's not completely ashamed of being gay. However, the need for the word 'completely' should be enough to show that Tyson's definitely not happy about being gay.

Currently Tyson's approach to dealing with his sexuality is to ignore it and to suppress his urges. He ignores any sexual urges until he gets to a point where he can't get to sleep without dealing with them. At which point he takes himself to the shower, then he begins suppressing them again.

When in a relationship with another man, Tyson's more accepting of his sexuality because he convinces himself that it's okay because he's only interesting in the person he's in a relationship with. This isn't true, but if there's one person Tyson can lie to, it's himself.

When in a relationship with a women, Tyson hated his sexuality more than ever. Tyson feels like he's letting his partner down by not being sexually attracted to them. Even when he doesn't allow his mind to wonder, Tyson feels like he's cheating on them simply on principle.

Let me put it this way, if Sebastian hadn't instilled a fear of alcohol and intimacy in Tyson, then his way of dealing with any sexual urges would be either of the following:

• Ignoring them, denying that they existed, denying that he could ever be a 'queer'. Then - when he gets too sexually frustrated, when that energy builds up too much - going to the nearest pub or bar he can find, getting drunk, and bedding whichever man would take him. Tyson would be aiming to be too drunk to remember it the following day. Whether he succeeded in that or not, Tyson would resume ignoring his urges.
• Again, ignoring his urges until he simply couldn't any more. Then getting drunk at home to avoid indulging in those urges. When that obviously failed [even with himself, Tyson is an affectionate and truthful drunk] he'd then start masturbating whilst thinking about men. During and after which, Tyson will refused to admit that he's a 'fruit' and continue drinking.

And, yes, those are the ways he deals with his sexuality in army!verse. Which he chooses alternates.

Tyson wishes it had been harder to let Kim go.

Tyson and Kim came to a peaceful, mutual decision to end their relationship on a good clean note. At the time Tyson agreed that it was the best option.

However, looking back on events, Tyson wishes that he’d fought harder for Kim.

He wishes that it could have been hard to let her go, that it had been harder for her to let him go, that they’d tried to make it work. Just for a little longer.

She broke his heart and he broke hers with their decision, but it was a ‘cold close’.

The end of their relationship just… happened.

Sleeping habits

Typically Tyson curls up as small as possible on his settee, to avoid pushing either his laptop or his dogs off of the other end.

When he actually makes it to a bed, Tyson curls up and hugs his duvet; almost hiding underneath it. It’s a case of vulnerability. He knows how vulnerable he is when asleep - very slow to wake and, though not a deep sleeper, not a light sleeper either - which is why he makes himself small (less of a target) and allows his dogs to sleep near him; added protection despite having their fur shed on the bed driving him up the wall.

Tyson usually sleep for nine hours a day, in shifts (03:00 - 07:00, 13:00 - 15:00, & 20:30 -23:30) so he can be work in the day whilst still being out at night: to walk his dogs away from the majority of people and to do his work for Jim.